Thailand Blog 001: An Admittance of Fear
I am going to Thailand and I am afraid. I am afraid of being unhappy there as I was at home. I am afraid of being outside my comfortable zone. I am afraid of running out money and being forced to return to job I am no longer passionate about. I am afraid of being lonely. And I am afraid of missing of mom. It has been five hours since I last saw her and already I miss her. What makes things worse is that I do not know when I will return. I may be gone five days, five weeks, or five months.
Recently, I have been becoming more mindful. And through my learning I have come to understand that only a minute amount of my rumination is useful.
As bad as things may go, there is always the flip side of the coin: things could extremely well. In reality, I will likely get a mixed bag. Either way, I have no way of knowing what will happen next. All I can really do is attempt to stay present and enjoy the current chapter of the journey.